Lack of communication in a relationship is a big problem for many couples. Most people have never learned to communicate. We don’t really think about it and yet, without this skill, a person can be handicapped in their social relationships.
However, this is a more serious problem when it comes to love life. After all, it is not for nothing that the lack of communication in a relationship is one of the problems that most often lead to separation or divorce. Knowing how to listen to others and being able to clearly express yourself are essential ingredients. Without this, it becomes almost impossible to establish a healthy relationship. Fortunately, it is quite possible to overcome the lack of communication in a relationship – with sufficient effort.
Disadvantages of lack of communication in a relationship
Among all the problems you can encounter, the lack of communication in a relationship is undoubtedly one of the most serious. And for good reason, when you fail to talk constructively with your partner, you leave the door wide open to misunderstandings. This often creates distance between you and your partner. You probably cannot feel understood if you are unable to share your feelings first.
Similarly, when there’s a continuous lack of communication in a relationship, this will certainly cause the breaking of the special bond that once united both partners. Your lover is unlikely to have a magic crystal ball to constantly tell them what’s going on in your head. Under these circumstances, it’s nearly impossible to get on the same page or just keep your relationship afloat. Knowing how to communicate, on the other hand, will surely help you to make your relationship last longer.
Moreover, many people often forget that to be effective, communication also implies knowing how to listen to others. As a human being, you are naturally inclined to concern yourself with your thoughts and feelings first. Nevertheless, it is essential to get rid of this habit since you will not be able to get fully involved in your relationship in this way.
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Consequences of lack of communication in a relationship
The lack of communication in a relationship can affect the well-being of both partners. Important communication elements can be lost. And that’s where all the different kinds of problems start that shouldn’t even exist, some of which include:
- Indifference (which can also cause the feeling of rejection )
- Constant irritability
- Verbal abuse
- Emotional insecurity
- Resentment (due to repressed feelings)
- And even infidelity
How to fix the lack of communication in a relationship
To overcome the lack of communication in a relationship, you can practice active listening. It can be particularly beneficial. It creates a safe space for everyone to express their feelings. Without it, you and your partner will never understand each other.
You can practice active listening by remaining really and genuinely attentive to what your significant other is saying. There are several ways to do this, including:
- Adopt positive body language by showing that what you are being told interests you while allowing the person to speak;
- Repeat or ask for explanations to avoid any misunderstanding;
- Ask open-ended questions rather than making statements or constantly giving advice;
- Put your own beliefs, thoughts, and feelings on the back burner to fully understand the emotions of your partner.
You also have to learn to accept your mistakes. And for good reason, your partner will surely get tired of trying to talk to you if every time they share their frustrations with you, you refuse to caution yourself. Taking ownership and taking responsibility for your actions is therefore an important element for you to start talking to each other again and finding solutions together.
Knowing how to listen to others and knowing how to communicate is crucial here because this is what will help you establish a trustworthy relationship.
Don’t hesitate to try individual or couple’s counseling. You can also check this blog post on how to keep the communication going in your relationship.
Lack of communication in a relationship: prevention is the best solution
Some people are not good at talking about their feelings. They find it difficult to confront each other and this can lead to a lack of communication in a relationship. If you or your partner is facing this problem, the best thing you can do is start with a good foundation.
From the start of your relationship, make communication a routine. Regularly discuss the things that bother you and what makes you truly happy in your relationship. You should come to a point where not chatting together – even for a day – feels weird.
Then, continue your efforts to always have good communication throughout your life as a couple by adopting good habits.
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Ask as many open-ended questions as possible
The best way to get your partner to open up is to simply ask questions. Sometimes, people don’t think to bring something to your attention until you ask. Especially since when this initiative comes from you, you will generally get an honest answer. This will prevent you later from having to deal with a lack of communication in a relationship since you can talk about everything and anything. “Why are you upset? “What do you think if I suggest this?” “What would you say if we do like this?” These are perfect examples of open-ended questions you can ask your partner.
Never ignore when your partner is mad at you
Of course, you can give them space to calm down, but be sure to talk about the problem when the time is right. If you just sweep all your worries under the rug, they will turn into resentment. And it’s really in this type of situation that the lack of communication in a relationship can lead to a breakup. Anyway, you must always remember that knowing how to accept your mistakes is essential.
Do not hold back
You don’t want to be mean when you talk about your displeasure. However, you also don’t want to minimize how you feel. If something bothers you so much that you think about it often, make sure you always express it. You must learn how to communicate respectfully without holding back.